Regrets?

"Any arbitrary turning along the way, and I would be elsewhere.  I would be different."  That's a quote from Under the Tuscan Sun, one of my favorite movies.  I've been thinking a lot lately about the past, the choices I've made.  Do you ever stop and ask yourself if you would have done this or that differently?  Most of us have at some point of another.  The past has been on my mind because I've been doing a lot of self-discovery.  I guess a divorce can do that to a person.  And with my son about to start Kindergarten in just a few days...... well..... it's hard not to let some memories come flooding back.  I loved school.  Always did-- from Kindergarten right up through graduation.  I know, I'm weird, right?  It wasn't the school itself that I loved so much.  It was the people, my friends, and even some of the teachers.  I had a teacher in 5th grade... Mrs. Unruh.  I loved that woman!!  She and her husband lived very modestly.  She drove an old fifty-something Chevy, they had only a very small house.  They chose to live this way because every summer, they would pick one country to visit.  They traveled all over the world, just the two of them.  And she would bring back tons of pictures and share them with all of her students.  She was a history teacher, and always found a way to connect her trip with whatever it was she was teaching.  I think she's one of the first people to really get me to start thinking out of the box.  Then all the way up through high school, I was so sure of myself, my dreams, who I was, what I wanted to do and be.  I wanted to be an astronaut.  I wanted to travel the stars, visit other worlds.  I was even accepted to the Air Force Academy and MIT.  I chose a different path.  I met a guy, fell in love (or so I thought), and gave up on that dream, a dream I'd had since my dad got me my first telescope when I was like 6.  I gave it up because I let him tell me what choices to make.  He didn't think that was a good path for me, and I listened to him.  But I can't blame him for that.  I was the one who ultimately made the choice, right?  That was my decision to make.  That relationship didn't last.  I did end up marrying him, but I was miserable from the beginning.  Then, several years later, an old friend came back into my life and I ended up marrying him.  Another mistake, if that's what you want to call it.  I don't know that I necessarily would.  I don't think I could really call either one a mistake... or any of the other relationships I had in between, either.  If I hadn't made the choices I did, then I wouldn't be where I am now, or who I am now.  Granted that girl that was so sure of herself back in high school got lost along the way.  But now, I'm starting to find her again.  I'm finally beginning to rediscover who I am and what I want.  And I like what I'm finding.  Well, for the most part, anyway.  There's always room for improvement.  But in looking back, and thinking about the possibilities of where my life would be had I made different choices.... I'm actually kind of glad that I made the ones I did.  There are great people in my life now that wouldn't have been there otherwise.  I wouldn't have my amazing son.  And I probably wouldn't be as grateful for the little blessings that I see around me every day.  I love to go out and dance around in the rain.  I love to lay in the grass and just watch the butterflies dance around in the air.  Hell, a couple of nights ago, I was talking to a beetle, and trying to help it get a cobweb unwrapped from around it's leg.  No.  No regrets.  I wouldn't want my life to be any other way.  It's not perfect, by any means.  But it's mine.  And I plan to make the most of it.